Not My First Manuscript

What writing three and a half books taught me about becoming an author.

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I recently finished editing my debut novel, A Light Unseen. Preparing my manuscript for querying to agents and publishers has me reflecting a lot on how far this journey has taken me. While A Light Unseen is the first novel I intend to publish, it is not my first manuscript. I started many different anecdotes and wrote almost three full novels before this story came into being. While the other books I wrote will never be published, they played a valuable role in my journey toward becoming an author.

Where It All Began: My 1st Novel

As a child, I wrote many small stories with messy drawings to accompany them. In middle school, I started developing my storytelling skills, going from scribbled scrap paper stories to fantasy worlds written in an orange spiral-bound notebook. It wasn’t until high school that my love for writing sparked my desire to become an author.

During high school, I finished my first novel, accompanied by pencil illustrations, poetry, and hand-drawn chapter headings. The story was about a young princess and her fire-bending traveling companion on the run from a gang of usurpers set on taking over the throne. About the length of a novella, the book had a simple plot, simple characters, and a lot of clichés. I was completely enthralled.

Yet when the book was finished, I didn’t feel satisfied. I found myself much more intrigued by the mysterious fire-bender than the main character.

So I wrote another book.

Spark to Flame: My 2nd Novel

Realizing that my high school story was lacking depth, I decided to pursue the fire-bending side character in his own tale. I looked to his past and asked myself, where did this character come from? How did he become the person he is now? So began the story of a young thief living in impoverished conditions. It was a tale of found magic, betrayal, and loss. His story was a fight for survival in a volatile environment.

My second book was written during a time in my life that was very difficult. I didn’t realize it at the time, but much of the distress going on in my very real world ended up reflected in my manuscript. The story was grim and full of anger, angst, and violence; a far cry from the princess story I’d written in high school. This story expanded my writing skills exponentially. I dove deep into the process, creating complex characters that were vivid in my mind. The finished book was over 80,000 words, much of which I wrote between college classes.

But I still wasn’t satisfied. Something was missing.

The characters were strong, I decided, but the plot was lacking. The worldbuilding and magic system had been carried over from my first manuscript, and it no longer fit the story I was trying to tell. So I placed the characters I loved in an entirely new story...

Searching for the Core:

My 3rd Novel

Using the characters from my second book, I took a different approach, exploring different points of view and writing styles. I wrote a complex magic system within a dystopian world. The characters were headstrong, and the plot was coming along nicely.

Then just over halfway through the manuscript, I hit a wall. It came unexpectedly, right when the plot was reaching a climax. I felt stuck. No matter what I tried, this book was getting me nowhere. While I struggled to dig the manuscript out of the mud, I realized that this story wasn't true to who I was as a writer. With some reluctance, I knew it was time to say goodbye.

Why a Failed Manuscript Isn't Always a "Failure"

Although it felt discouraging then, hitting a wall was the turning point I needed to discover who I was as a writer. It was then that I realized my writing needed something more. I had been rehashing the same story over and over again. It was time to take a step back and look at the bigger picture. I asked myself why I wanted to be an author. What story was I trying to tell? What was it that I wanted to share with the world? Understanding the answers to these questions helped me create a vision for the kind of author I wanted to be. This gave me the direction I needed to bring out the heart and soul of my writing.

Discovering the Story's Heart:

My Debut Novel

So what made A Light Unseen different from the rest? The simple truth was this new story was one that came from the heart. Instead of rehashing old tropes and rewriting the same story, I delved into the very heart of bones of who I wanted to be as a writer. This brought out the best in my work, allowing me to flesh out a story rich with feeling and passion. My characters felt more real, my world-building felt more alive, and I was more committed to the story I was trying to tell.

Even if I could go back, I wouldn’t change the stories I wrote in the past. Mistakes and all, they were an important part of my growth and development as a writer, and they helped me through the different stages of my younger life. In the end, my failures made me stronger. I made mistakes, learned from them, and became a better writer as a result.